say goodnight, to yourself
<<2003-04-30 - 7:28 p.m.>>

"Turn out the light, just say goodnight, to yourself...

Is it really true, could you save yourself for someone who, loves you for you...

And for a moment you felt important but not in your heart, my self esteem, it's been low, go ahead and count it's been lower than low...

I know the feeling of it stealing life out from under me, I want to learn, how you save yourself for someone who, loves you for you...

Give it away to someone who someone who will cherish your name"

yellowtulips (from my fave diaries list) suggested this as a download and I'm glad she did. It's an amazing song. Go get!

So I spent today in a weird state of mind. I almost broke down a little last night but I stopped myself, having no desire to start sobbing in front of Rob. Why should he have to put up with all my shit? Lol. Not that it's a huge deal anyway. Just... Thursday tomorrow. With any luck, our lives will change by the time I write my next entry. Fingers crossed.

I love him so much. He's such a beautiful person.

I can do this. I can work it all out and find time for everything. I can balance work with life. I can keep going. I can. Can.

It turns out, the parents are not only going to pay for my accommodation at Durham, they will also pay for half my tuition fees. So all in all I'm gonna be a pretty rich student, by anyone's standards.

So, I worked, did an exam, and it was all fine. I finished the exam early and just left, way before everyone else. If it went badly, then so be it. It was only a mock, after all.

I'm gonna go back to listening to music and thinking about things.

<< - >>